That's One Sexy Vegan

Peta announced Dexter Thomas is their Sexiest Transgender Vegan of the year. I knew you were waiting on the edge of your seat for this news so you can all relax now.

Dexter Thomas, 34, of Salt Lake City, is a transgender rights activist who is studying for his Ph.D. in social psychology at the University of Utah, the animal-rights group said in an announcement Wednesday.

Yep. I pretty much knew immediately he had gauged ears, I didn't even need to see a picture. But hey he's a transgender rights activist/vegan that lives in Utah and plans on being a social psychologist so you know the party follows him wherever he goes.

But if you do wind up in the same room with him be careful to avoid the following subjects.

Men
Women
Animals
George Bush
Corporations
Big Pharma
Marijuana
Monsanto
9/11
Gauged ears
Ironic horn-rimmed glasses
Bernie Sanders
Early onset Osteoporosis
Global Warming...

I would have continued but I started to get tired. Hey here's an idea, why not just stay home? Unless you wanted a Veggie burger smothered in imitation bacon and initiation cheese and Sriracha with a side order of cucumber and a Mike's Hard Lemonade. Who knows it might be good.